


Needy

by UnknownScribes



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: Alvin Olinsky - Freeform, Antonio needs a hug, Cuddling & Snuggling, Driving, First Kiss, Fluff, Hank Voight Needs a Hug, Hugs, I'm Bad At Tagging, Idiots in Love, Kissing, M/M, Motel, Romantic Fluff, Sharing a Bed, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, al is mentioned, hanktonio, kiss, kissing in bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:00:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24032410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnknownScribes/pseuds/UnknownScribes
Summary: Hank and Antonio are desperate for closeness, they are needy for love, and they find both those things in one another, but only where prying eyes won't or can't see them.
Relationships: Antonio Dawson/Hank Voight
Comments: 6
Kudos: 61





	Needy

**Author's Note:**

> I dunno where this came from, enjoy.

Hank wouldn't admit it, not in a million years, but he craved touch, he craved affection. He would never dare say it out loud, if only because of his late wife, though he knows deep down she'd want him to move on. That was easier said than done. He got by for a long time saying he'd never love anyone the way he loved her and no one would love him like she had. He wished it was true, that no one could ever love him so much, so purely, but he knew somewhere out there someone loved him just the same as she had, he'd never claim they loved him more. He wasn't ready to love again, not really. He was, but he refused and denied it, and he'd do so until the feelings went away. If it helped him to close his eyes and rest, then so be it.

\--

Antonio wasn't the biggest fan of his wife, but if he missed one thing, it was having company, having someone who loved him in his corner. He tried telling himself that she didn't love him, after all she left him because of his job, she didn't understand it. But she did love him, even now, even after everything happened. They had their rough patches, but she still loved him, she just wasn't in love with him. He still loved her too, loved his children more though. His children were his life, the ones he worried most about in the divorce, throughout the process they were first and foremost. He still loved Laura, but his kids were most important. Even though Laura would claim otherwise. She just didn't understand, or so he'd tell himself, whatever got him to sleep at night.

-x-x-

Hank was always sharp, always had some distant coldness to him, even where his unit was concerned. He was warm and friendly, but in the depths lurked that distant cold that he'd grown so accustomed to, perhaps his line of defense from the world and all the evil and bad he'd seen. Antonio felt that he wasn't too far behind Hank, and he could see Al was toeing that same line. He hoped Al never lost that warmth that made him, well, him. He wished that Hank hadn't have become like that, because he knew how he felt about it. Hank didn't seem to feel though, he was rock solid, steady, shouldering all the burden for his unit and then some. The world was not kind to Hank Voight, though he brought some of it upon himself, he could've been smarter with a few choices. But it wasn't his place to judge, it wasn't his job either. He was pulled out of his thoughts when they were called to head out.

"Hey, Hank." Antonio said to break the silence, he couldn't stand much more of it. Hank looked over, indicating Antonio had his attention, even if it wasn't undivided. "Are you okay Bro, you seem... uh, more distant?" Antonio was beating himself up on the inside, that was such a stupid decision, he might as well just shoot himself dead now. Hank hummed, but he didn't offer anymore of a reply. "I'm sorry, that didn't come out exactly like I meant." He scratched his head nervously, looking out the window, "forget I said anything..." Hank just hummed again. Antonio wouldn't admit it, but something burned him up inside. Why couldn't Hank just open up for once in his life?

"You wanna know, I'm not okay." Hank finally said, probably half an hour later, and Antonio's eyes snapped to look at him, searching his face. Why was this such a long drive? He exhaled sharply, flicking on his turn signal, shifting lanes. "Happy?" Hank asked, voice sharp and hurt. This time Antonio hummed softly in reply, he expected something more to come from him.

"I'm sorry." He repeated when it was clear Hank wasn't saying anything more. Hank rolled his eyes. "Listen, I'm just trying to make conversation." He sounded more defensive then he meant to, an aggressive tone in his voice. This time Hank's eyes snapped to look at him, though the focus quickly went back to the road ahead. He wanted Hank to trust him, to open up, and now it felt that was an impossible goal, even further away from being a chance. "I'm sorry, that wasn't how I meant to say that. My mistake." Antonio apologized for the third time today. 

"It's fine, I snapped." Hank answered, still focusing on the drive, but he looked a bit tired. They still had some time left to go. "I'm just, thinking." Hank added cryptically, he should be riding with Al if he's going to talk like him. Antonio nodded, not that Hank could see it. 

"I can drive if you need me to," Antonio offered, voice hardly above a whisper, maybe some sleep would help Hank, "you seem tired." Hank shook his head and sighed a little, he didn't think sleeping would help. He just wanted to finish out the drive, hit the hotel bed, and pass out dead to the world away from his unit.

"I can make it, I'm a grown man." Hank said lowly, almost sounding offended. Antonio set his jaw, he was getting annoyed. "Besides I'll get motel room if I'm tired enough, I'm too old to be sleeping in a car." He said with a short laugh, it was true though. Sleeping in cars of any size was a young man's game, and even then it was a painful one most the time.

"Alright." Antonio huffed, crossing his arms, a motel sounded nice though. The thought of a bed getting to him, he yawned. "Okay, now I'm tired, what the hell." Antonio tried breaking the mood, glad to see Hank quirk a smile and a brow. "That motel sounds nice right about now." He chuckled softly, looking at Hank. 

"Okay, we'll find a place, we're ahead of the others anyway, so we'll sleep in." Hank said and Antonio was taken aback, he never saw Hank as the sleeping in type. 

"Cool." Antonio said with a tired grin. And he was relieved when Hank pulled off to the first good looking motel they spotted. Unfortunately there was only a single room with a single bed left, but it was better than nothing at any rate. They didn't intend to sleep in the car after all. They paid down the nightly rent, collected their belongings and the key, and headed to the room to figure things out. They settled on sharing, the couch was so beat up sleeping in the car looked like a great idea in comparison, but the bed was so nice. It was a queen size, firm enough that it didn't swallow them whole, but not so firm that it was a soft brick. "Oh this is so nice!" Antonio all but sighed out, adjusting into the warmth of the blankets. Hank rolled his eyes at him again, earning a playful huff from the younger man. Hank slid into the bed, get comfortable. 

The warmth between them was so very nice, it reminded them both that it existed, that it wasn't something they'd just dreamt up so long ago. It was inviting, it was gentle, it was calm. Antonio scooched closer, mostly asleep, inhibitions long gone with exhaustion. Hank sidled nearer, an arm finding it's way beneath his side. Soon enough Antonio's arms were enveloping him, the warmth amplified. Hank smiled, he was rather tired himself and Antonio's warmth, his presence alone, made sleep that much harder to fend off. Antonio tugged him closer, holding him tight, glad that he was there. He appreciated him, he was glad to have him, he needed him to know that. Long hidden feelings bubbled back up to the surface, awakening things buried deep inside. Hank nuzzled closer, he was just as desperate, he could feel it churning in his stomach after all. They both were so needy, so desperate, they needed it, they needed each other all along and they never knew it, until they were forced to share a bed. Antonio wouldn't trade this moment for anything, except perhaps more time like this with the older man. Hank hoped that more was to come, the deepest recesses of his wishing he'd get to hold on forever. They were both so desperate for love and they didn't know it, they didn't want to say it, they didn't want to think of it. But they both thought, no knew, that it would slip out and come to light eventually. They'd be prepared for that day though, it'd only happen on their terms. And in the heat of the -lazy- moment, they shared a short soft kiss on the lips. It left both of their minds humming. 

Yeah, the motel was a great idea.


End file.
